With that said, I wished I was Heidi or at least had a tenth of that gene pool when I was standing in the Old Navy dressing room yesterday. I was looking not so bad in some maternity get up when I decided to try on a dress. I need a dress for a few events coming up and have been half thinking that a tent would be more apropos. Anyhow, I put on this purple soft cotton number with a low neckline and wrap tie at the back. Oh and it hit at my knees, my little hobbit knees. Barf!
I looked like hell. I mean seriously, who am I trying to kid - my ankles looked like they were holding their breath, my sticks are pale white and my ass? Don't get me started. I mean even with Spanx for the rear, I am still 5'2" and now looked like a grape with a pillow stuffed in the front.
No dress for me. I'm going to go with option #2. And yes, I wish I had Heidi's 8 month pregnant ass at this point. Well, that still would not have helped.....but wishful thinking.
Here is the grape ape: